Thank you GE 2011

6th May, 2011 - Cooling-off Day.

Today, everyone seem to have quietened down. Like them, I, too, cleared my heart of the many emotions. I took a step back, and I saw what GE 2011 has made of me.

GE 2011 has made me realize who I really am - My morals, my values, my beliefs, my ideals and so many more. Basically, it helped me to re-discover myself. It helped me to bring out, once again, the little child who questioned about every single thing. It helped me re-discover the old me who conformed to society's pressures because he feared to be left out. But ultimately, it helped me find out about the things I never knew about myself. And seriously speaking, it's really a great feeling to be yourself. It's great to not conform to the many things out there because we don't agree with it. Gone are the days where I have stood with society's/peers' consensus because I was afraid that I would end up alone. In fact, it's really not that bad to be alone. At least, you get time to reflect on the many occurrence in our everyday's life. And sometimes, we get so swayed by what people around us feel that we actually forget what we stand for.

After GE 2011, I might, really, end up alone. But at least, I know I have stood up for the things I believe in. At least, I didn't sit back and conform because I was afraid of the consequences. At least, I know that from here on, I am able to be myself, that I have matured beyond what I was made to be. At least, I know that I have an ideal, a goal to reach out for. At least, I know that from here on, I am able to pursue what I truly want. And at least, I learnt how to be more humane. I learnt that one cannot peg a monetary value unto every single thing. Every individual is unique, as I always believed. They are not just another statistic.

After all these, I do recognize that it takes more than just another voice in the internet to make the difference. Henceforth, it just makes me more determined to do better, earn more and help more, so that I'll be able to stand up for what I believe in. If any, it have made me more resolved.

Chances are, I won't be a political activist the moment the fever of GE 2011 dies down. It made me carefully consider what I want to be. I actually wanted to be a philosopher. But that's just what I want to be. What I would really become, shall be made known to me as I discover more of myself as I walk.

One of my friends told me to look back at my posts in 5 years time. (I don't actually know if he meant the next GE, or after I become more mature.) It made me realize one thing, and now I question myself. Will I be so caught up in being the best, that I, once again, forget what I stood up for? Would I, then, be so well-to-do, that I forget how to empathize with the plight of others? Will I be just another product of our education system, the one that I have mentioned? Will I have lost my beliefs and ideals that I have today?

I don't hold the answers to these questions. But I definitely hope that, as I walk, I find, not lose, more of myself.